She wore a pink hoodie and we called her by many names: Matte, Meow-Meow and Smelly-cat. Sure, she was an old cat with many health problems, but we just weren’t prepared when we had to make that final decision. It was only eight weeks ago we said goodbye to our beloved Matte cat, but it seems like just yesterday.

The house is lonely without her. I swear I see glimpses of her out of the corner of my eye sometimes. I can still remember how it felt to pet her, touch her nose and have her sit in my lap purring happily. No matter all the comfort friends and family have tried to give me one fact remains…I miss my cat and I wish she was still alive. It’s just lonely without her.

I work in a 24-hour veterinary emergency practice. I am used to pets dying and helping owners make that difficult decision. However, when it was my pet, I found myself becoming the owner. For most of us, losing a pet means losing a family member. It’s important to realize that you will need to take the time to grieve.

Everyone grieves differently. Some people need to keep busy and want to be surrounded by friends and family while others just want to be left alone. Most people will go through five stages of grief.

1. Denial: “This can’t be happening to me”

2. Anger: “Why me?”

3. Bargaining: Begging, wishing and praying for them to come back

4. Depression: Overwhelming feelings of hopelessness

5. Acceptance: Realizing your pet is gone and starting to focus on the good memories of the past 

While grieving is personal and different for everyone, it’s important to realize that you will go through these stages and finding a support group is important. For many people, finding such a group can be difficult. When a human family member dies, coworkers, friends and family are generally supportive and caring. When a pet dies, many people have the mentality that “it is just a pet.” This couldn’t be further from the truth. 

You can suffer as great a personal loss by losing a pet as you can when you lose a human family member. Make sure you tell those around you how you are feeling and, if they dismiss your feelings, than be sure to find support elsewhere. Support can be found in pet bereavement counseling services, pet-loss support hotlines and online grief groups. There have also been many books, videos, and magazine articles published on the topic of losing a pet.

Many people find comfort in remembering their pet. Having a memorial service, creating a scrapbook or writing down stories helps many people to overcome grief and reflect on the happy memories.

Above all else, you must recognize that you will miss your pet and that your feelings of sadness and overwhelming grief are normal. Remember you are not alone. Roughly two out of three Americans own a pet. That means about 66% of the people in this country have likely had to deal with the loss of a pet. You are definitely not alone.

I miss my Matte cat. She had a kind soul, and she was one cool cat in her pink hoodie (which started out as a joke, but turned out to make her one fashionable cat). I know it was her time to leave and go to the Rainbow Bridge, but I would have done anything to keep her with me longer. I now remember those happy times. Sometimes I find myself giggling out loud because I think of something Matte did that was funny or cute. She was a great cat and will be greatly missed. I know that many of you understand…

This Was Written In Memory of Matte, George, Molly, Soot, Minnie and Bluegrass.

For More Help With The Loss of a Pet:

The Association for Pet Loss and Bereavement

Pet Loss Support Page

HSUS (search keyword: Pet Loss)

ASPCA (search keyword: Pet Loss)

Petplace (search keyword: Pet Loss)

Pet Grief Counseling Phone Numbers:

Petloss.com

AVMA

Delta Society

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This entry was posted on Monday, October 6th, 2008 at 9:53 am and is filed under Amy Breton, Pet Stories. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.