Losing a Pet: Coping With The Loss Of Your Furry Friend
October 6th, 2008 by Amy BretonShe wore a pink hoodie and we called her by many names: Matte, Meow-Meow and Smelly-cat. Sure, she was an old cat with many health problems, but we just weren’t prepared when we had to make that final decision. It was only eight weeks ago we said goodbye to our beloved Matte cat, but it seems like just yesterday.
The house is lonely without her. I swear I see glimpses of her out of the corner of my eye sometimes. I can still remember how it felt to pet her, touch her nose and have her sit in my lap purring happily. No matter all the comfort friends and family have tried to give me one fact remains…I miss my cat and I wish she was still alive. It’s just lonely without her.
I work in a 24-hour veterinary emergency practice. I am used to pets dying and helping owners make that difficult decision. However, when it was my pet, I found myself becoming the owner. For most of us, losing a pet means losing a family member. It’s important to realize that you will need to take the time to grieve.
Everyone grieves differently. Some people need to keep busy and want to be surrounded by friends and family while others just want to be left alone. Most people will go through five stages of grief.
1. Denial: “This can’t be happening to me”
2. Anger: “Why me?”
3. Bargaining: Begging, wishing and praying for them to come back
4. Depression: Overwhelming feelings of hopelessness
5. Acceptance: Realizing your pet is gone and starting to focus on the good memories of the past
While grieving is personal and different for everyone, it’s important to realize that you will go through these stages and finding a support group is important. For many people, finding such a group can be difficult. When a human family member dies, coworkers, friends and family are generally supportive and caring. When a pet dies, many people have the mentality that “it is just a pet.” This couldn’t be further from the truth.
You can suffer as great a personal loss by losing a pet as you can when you lose a human family member. Make sure you tell those around you how you are feeling and, if they dismiss your feelings, than be sure to find support elsewhere. Support can be found in pet bereavement counseling services, pet-loss support hotlines and online grief groups. There have also been many books, videos, and magazine articles published on the topic of losing a pet.
Many people find comfort in remembering their pet. Having a memorial service, creating a scrapbook or writing down stories helps many people to overcome grief and reflect on the happy memories.
Above all else, you must recognize that you will miss your pet and that your feelings of sadness and overwhelming grief are normal. Remember you are not alone. Roughly two out of three Americans own a pet. That means about 66% of the people in this country have likely had to deal with the loss of a pet. You are definitely not alone.
I miss my Matte cat. She had a kind soul, and she was one cool cat in her pink hoodie (which started out as a joke, but turned out to make her one fashionable cat). I know it was her time to leave and go to the Rainbow Bridge, but I would have done anything to keep her with me longer. I now remember those happy times. Sometimes I find myself giggling out loud because I think of something Matte did that was funny or cute. She was a great cat and will be greatly missed. I know that many of you understand…
This Was Written In Memory of Matte, George, Molly, Soot, Minnie and Bluegrass.
For More Help With The Loss of a Pet:
The Association for Pet Loss and Bereavement
HSUS (search keyword: Pet Loss)
ASPCA (search keyword: Pet Loss)
Petplace (search keyword: Pet Loss)
Pet Grief Counseling Phone Numbers:
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June 3rd, 2010 at 10:02 am
[...] Also in a previous Halo blog you can read “Losing a Pet: Coping With The Loss Of Your Furry Friend” [...]
June 3rd, 2010 at 10:37 am
i am writting hoping that someone will finally answer me. i am worried that i am going to lose my pets as i am a long time user of halo and even use to drive out of state to buy halo then i think it was only can food and dream coat but in jan. this jan. i ordered dip and 30 lb bags of halo along w/ new product odor and stain remover. and here it is in june now earth fare has not gotten the order in Yet! and as i adopted 4 new dogs in all my 49 years of being a pet owner never not one dog i had even in 23 years of life for that girl never had one flea and one i had 21 years no fleas and one 4 years after the 21 year old no fleas but i adopted 4 new ones so they would not be put to sleep they had fleas very bad. so i special ordered the halo dip and it has still not arrived now it has been six months and i have a big flea problem i steam clean daily and vac and wash i feel i am in danger of losing my dogs due to fleas and now i love these dogs as long as cool weather it was fine even w/ ac on day and night i have fleas and never did i have this problem but it seems so hard to get halo items now and earth fare isn’t helpping and i fear i will have to go to another brand. i am so sad as i know halo is the best but if you can’t get it then you can’t usethe brand. and they are now out of dog food and i now have six dogs and i don’t know what to do because when the last time they ran out they did not have halo for over a month or the supplements and that is when i ran into the flea problem when my dogs went w/out supplements and on another brand of food for over a month and so sad because i had placed the order for 30 lb bags and i bought the last two bags the other day 3 days ago and with six dogs won’t last long this is not good for the halo name . i am so upset about this i am not a young person and i have never had to go through something like this and 40+ years of having dogs speaks for its self and my vet was so shocked as even the adopted pets were in such good health until the switch/ switch from brand to brand because such long periods between earth fare getting halo back on their shelves in store. i just don’t order on line and i do not want to use another brand but it seems i am being forced to and i have three people i know who have already switche because they said they are going to go through what i am i am so very upset because i know halo is good and they are using innova now can you see help or do you want to lose another loyal customer? it doesn’t give halo a good name when a store does this even though it is not halos fault… some people say something must be wrong w/ halos food and say i won’t use it anymore.can you help me understand what is wrong i used and loved what halo did for my pets but now i just am not sure if halo care as much as i believed in halo’s name i even wrote a letter to ellen about this i have cried because i don’t want my dog’s on anything but halo and i can’t get it and am about to run out in just a day or so… help me please